So I have an exam coming up this Wednesday, one of the ones I deferred when I had my mental breakdown in January, and I'm already feeling the stress. Obviously I couldn't fixate on HIV this time, instead I woke up at 4am the other day convinced that my ex boyfriend is going to kill me. Despite the fact that we haven't spoken in three years, and we live in different countries for most of the year. So I was up until around 5-6am googling murder rates in the UK and stories of women who had been killed by their exes.
I had an appointment with the doctor today and - quelle surprise - this sort of thought is not normal. Sooo I have been put on Diazepam until my exam is over in an attempt to stop me going completely loopy. I started taking them today and boy, you can tell its a sedative! I had one 2mg tablet and after half an hour or so I was feeling floppy and woozy! It definitely calmed my anxious fidgeting though! I'm going to take another one before bed and see if I sleep through the night :)
I will update on how the exam goes on Wednesday night...hopefully it won't go horrifyingly bad.
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